Who Will Play You in the Movie About Your Life?

My answer to that question is easy. I can answer it without hesitation.

Jenny McCarthy.

People who know me just went, "Ha!" Their response is surely because as far as physical features go, Jenny McCarthy and I share none. Tina Fey and I share more, but I'd still pick Jenny McCarthy to play me in the movie about my life.

My admiration for Jenny McCarthy dates back to her days on Singled Out, the MTV game show. I loved the way she elbowed guys as she burst through a crowd of them to get in front of the cameras. She was crass and yet simply silly. A few years later, I worked with her best friend. (I know! Six degrees of separation really isn't just a theory.) (This is also not my only "brush with fame", but the others will have to be for a different post, they don't really apply here.) The day I found out they were best friends, I gushed, "Oh my gosh, tell her she is hysterical on Wings." Then, she started writing books, and I read every one. She made me laugh out loud, and if you're an author that can do that, well, I reserve a bookmark for you for life.

It wasn't until Louder Than Words, that I stopped viewing her only as a celebrity. She wrote of a day she knew her son's treatment wasn't going well, and sat amongst women who probably knew the same thing. However, these women did nothing about it. She wrote of leaving and vowing to find the help her son needed. I was so drawn to her passion for her child. I knew that if I ever had to face anything of that magnitude with my children, I'd do the exact same thing. I'd go to the ends of the Earth for them. Now, I know MANY moms would say that, but there is a difference between saying it and doing it. I think even back then, in 2007, the universe was preparing me for my future.

The other day, I read Jenny's latest book, Love, Lust, and Faking It. In it, she writes of the beginning of her career and where she is today. This short chapter led me to do a vast amount of thinking. I thought of evolution.

Not evolution, ape to man (even though that is where I stand on the issue), but evolution of self. 

You see, even five years ago, I was not even a smidge as strong as I am today. If all that has fallen on me had fallen on that girl, well, she would have drowned, been swallowed up, she would not have survived.

First of all, I was terribly insecure. I think I put on a good act, but most days, I quaked with insecurity. This insecurity caused me to just be a royal... bitch at times. I tried so hard to mask any sign of insecurity, my actions displayed the exact opposite.

Second of all, I had no idea what direction I was headed in. None. When any thought of the future arose in my head, it was pure fog. I knew in my heart, I should be seeing a clear picture of family, house, and happiness, but I never once did. Now, I know why there was never that picture there, it wasn't meant to be.

So, some how, some where in those five years, I started to figure myself out. I think I learned it from being a mom. I learned to trust myself, trust my decisions, trust my direction, just trust me. Because me was who I was going to need the most.

What was about to happen to me would require me to be my absolute strongest. Anything less, would not do. So, you see, evolution of self is pertinent, it is absolute, it is a must. If you do not evolve, you are not you.

I have some final thoughts... one being, I wonder if Jenny McCarthy reads blogs?

And, this post is dedicated to Marti... if she won't erase her past, I won't erase mine.

And finally, I'd love to know your answer to the question.